TWiT 201/Transcript

From The Official TWiT Wiki
Jump to: navigation, search
Episode 201


This transcript is provided by our friends at Pods in Print

Leo Laporte Bandwidth for this WEEK in TECH is provided by AOL Radio at

This is TWiT, This WEEK in TECH, episode 201 for June 28, 2009: “HI Leo Laporte FOR THROATBEARDS”

This WEEK in TECH is brought to you by Sign up for the Platinum plan and get two free books. Go to and follow Audible on Twitter. User ID, audible_com.

And by GoToMeeting. Business travel can kill your company’s profits. So do more, save more and travel less with GoToMeeting. For your free 30 day trial. Visit

This is TWiT, this WEEK in TECH episode 201 and we are gathered in the newly air-conditioned TWiT cottage with John C. Dvorak. I couldn’t, I really couldn’t make John come here anymore in the heat. And then he says ‘it’s blowing on me. It’s cold.’

John C. Dvorak It’s too cold here. I came up here because it’s like 100.

Leo Laporte It’s 100.

John C. Dvorak Yeah it’s great.

Leo Laporte It’s a 100 and you like that?

John C. Dvorak You know what’s really cool about this kind of hot temperature? Anyone that has ever ridden a motorcycle knows this. Normally you go on a motorcycle and kind of cool off. But every once a while you get to a temperature that’s hotter than the cool off temperature, it’s like a warm – so you’re like in a convection oven, so the faster you’re going the bike, the hotter and more miserable you get.

Leo Laporte That doesn’t sound like fun.

John C. Dvorak That’s what is like out here right now. It’s fantastic.

Leo Laporte Brian Brushwood who has taught me how to eat fire is also here.

Brian Brushwood Yeah they’re daring me to try to teach John in the chat room.

Leo Laporte Do you have your implements?

Brian Brushwood There out in the car. We might be able to work something out.

Leo Laporte John you want to eat fire?

John C. Dvorak I wouldn’t mind learning how to do that.

Leo Laporte It’s not hard and it’s fun.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, well I don’t know how much fun it would be.

Leo Laporte It’s great.

John C. Dvorak Have to wash your mouth out with all that stuff

Brian Brushwood You just get to get – it’s just poisonous, it’s awesome.

Leo Laporte The good news is the air conditioner leaks a little bit. So you could just stand underneath it and if the – we didn’t start the fire but the air conditioner would put it out. How about that? So we have a number of stories, not very many frankly because I was lazy this week. This is my last show before I head to China. I should mention next week, John will host. He is going to takeover the show and if you watch live on, John will be here early about two in the afternoon Pacific, 5 p.m. Eastern. And he is going to do about an hour of wine before TWiT.

John C. Dvorak I will do about an hour of wine and we’re going to have a great show afterwards.

Brian Brushwood It’s going to be great.

John C. Dvorak No it wouldn’t.

Leo Laporte And I think we have Becky Worley coming up to join you for TWiT…

John C. Dvorak Oh that’d be good

Leo Laporte and you can invite of course anybody else you want, but Becky –

John C. Dvorak I think we should get Jason on.

Leo Laporte You want – really?

John C. Dvorak That’d be kind of amusing.

Leo Laporte Actually you know, Jason can’t do it. I asked Jason if he wanted to do either the 5th or the 12th at the same time as I asked you and he said he’s in the World Series of Poker on the 5th. And he may, if he continues to succeed, be playing on the 12th.

John C. Dvorak Well may be he should be tweeting us.

Leo Laporte He should tweet from the table.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Brian Brushwood I think he was doing that. He was talking about some of the preliminary games he’s been playing. Sounded like he was doing pretty well.

John C. Dvorak I see him tweeting from the table and then seeing his – seeing what he looks like with broken fingers.

Leo Laporte ‘You were tweeting’ There are probably some things that are probably just not allowed. You can tweet almost anywhere. I have a jury summons the day I come back from China and I was thinking maybe I should tell the judge ‘your Honour, I would like to live blog while I’m here in the trial’.

Brian Brushwood What would possibly go wrong with that? It sounds brilliant.

Leo Laporte What could possibly go wrong? He will love that.

So, this was the week, a sad week for celebrities because, well first. Who’s first Ed McMahon first.

Brian Brushwood But no even before him, David Carradine.

Leo Laporte David Carradine, does he count?

Brian Brushwood It was only a couple of weeks ago.

Leo Laporte So he was the kind of the warm up back. Poor David.

Brian Brushwood Oh Dom DeLuise. Bea Arthur. Then Ed McMahon

Leo Laporte Dom DeLuise. Bea Arthur. Then Ed McMahon. And then in fast succession the beautiful Farrah Fawcett.

Brian Brushwood Totally overshadowed.

Leo Laporte Three minutes after she dies, Michael Jackson goes and of course that – yeah she lost all.

John C. Dvorak And then who’s the happiest guy in the world?

Leo Laporte Who?

John C. Dvorak Sanford the Governor from South Carolina.

Leo Laporte Yes, the big winner here.

Brian Brushwood He’s the big winner. He said all the cameras were taken off him immediately.

Leo Laporte Oh, he loves that. When we did the site on MSNBC Princess Diana died.

John C. Dvorak Oh yeah which killed…

Leo Laporte It killed the site, because MSNBC went to wall-to-wall Diana coverage and was so successful they said why are doing this stupid stuff for? Let’s just keep – maybe if more celebrities die we can have ratings.

Brian Brushwood Wow. Speaking of – and the ultimate celebrity, the ultimate pitchman, Billy Mays.

Leo Laporte And then today Billy Mays. Very sad. There is...

John C. Dvorak By the way that is a true story about the MSNBC.

Leo Laporte Oh yeah, they cancelled the site and then was it forever.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte I know exactly when the site was cancelled. They didn’t cancel it, they put us on “hiatus” and then just never brought us back.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, that’s what hiatus means.

Leo Laporte Yeah hiatus means you’re cancelled!

So I, there is a site and I don’t know if it’s for Billy Mays or for Michael Jackson. ‘Click the green play button to begin’ it says here. What could go wrong? I don’t even see a green play button.

Brian Brushwood I think you already clicked it. I don’t know what it looks like.

John C. Dvorak Maybe just click the, or maybe it’s not at the bottom. This is one of those sites it has the play button so small…

Leo Laporte When I refresh it, it jumps and it goes away.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, looks good and...

Brian Brushwood You can’t do it.

John C. Dvorak Yeah that’s a winner.

Leo Laporte Billytweets is oh well.

John C. Dvorak Not functioning.

Brian Brushwood Never mind.

Leo Laporte Oh good I clicked one link and it gives me a Java script tutorial. So I –

John C. Dvorak Well at least you got something out of it.

Leo Laporte I think that’s probably a mistake.

Brian Brushwood And out tech angle is complete.

Leo Laporte Yeah, a Twitter tribute to Michael Jackson.

John C. Dvorak Oh please. Okay that’s enough. I think we’ve seen enough.

Leo Laporte All right, yeah. So how did you find out that Michael Jackson passed away, Brian Brushwood?

Brian Brushwood On Twitter.

Leo Laporte On the internet, right?

Brian Brushwood And what’s great is it used to be, I used to be so mad, because the way I would find out celebrities died was you had to figure it out, because you’d look on Google News and it would say something vague like Billy Mays was a great man. You’re like what does that mean? Did he die or something? And you Twitter it and figure out that he died.

John C. Dvorak I was one of the first of the five twitterers that nailed this one by the way.

Leo Laporte Which one? Michael.

John C. Dvorak Michael Jackson.

Brian Brushwood There is plenty to choose from now.

Leo Laporte So you were reading TMZ and you said ‘hey this is a big story’?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte You were reading TMZ? You nicked this..

John C. Dvorak No actually Eric called me up and told me. He was reading TMZ.

Leo Laporte That’s what I found interesting. I get a text message from my 14-year old son and a phone call from my 17-year old daughter that Michael Jackson had died. They didn’t even remember him – I mean all they would remember of him is, is the freaky years. But I guess they knew that this was a big deal. He was the Elvis of the generation. This is as big as Elvis.

John C. Dvorak I don’t know, I mean this it’s the kind of thing, I mean, it seems...

Leo Laporte You know what’s really weird. It’s the minute Billy Mays passed away everybody forgot about Michael Jackson.

John C. Dvorak Well at least amongst us, amongst the techies. I don’t think the general public.

Leo Laporte This is all they are talking about on Twitter is Billy Mays.

John C. Dvorak Well I think just the techies again. I don’t think it’s the general public. I think they’re still. I think you’re going to see Michael Jackson specials for the next two or three days on all these shows. You’re not gonna see any Billy Mays specials.

Leo Laporte Yeah that’s true.

Brian Brushwood Well it’s already in the top – like 7 of the top 10 on iTunes are Michael Jackson singles.

Leo Laporte He owns iTunes all of a sudden. Not singles too, albums as well.

Brian Brushwood Somebody suggested that it may in fact be a scam, I don’t know, that would be a dark –

Leo Laporte That’d be a good one.

John C. Dvorak A Michael Jackson scam? Wouldn’t that be fantastic?

Brian Brushwood He wakes up and he’s just like ‘no more debt for me! Thank you!’

John C. Dvorak ‘I’m back! I’m back. I’m back.’

Leo Laporte No, he is not going to be back.

John C. Dvorak No that’s true. But it is – I agree, what an idea. Sick but good idea.

Leo Laporte Yeah sick but good idea.

Brian Brushwood It was really interesting to watch the split between the people who were –

Leo Laporte I still don’t think that any Andy Koffman’s dead but that’s just –

John C. Dvorak I think we are pretty – I think that’s done.

Leo Laporte He’s not coming back now.

John C. Dvorak He’s dead of old age if nothing else.

Leo Laporte He’s not coming back. We shouldn’t joke about this. This is serious stuff.

John C. Dvorak Yes it is in fact.

Brian Brushwood What was interesting though is to see the split between people who were like very deeply moved, like ‘oh no, I was such a fan, blablabla’ and then other people who are like ‘I remember’, one of the guys were from dadlabs, he just tweeted out ‘uhh…dude dangled his kid off a balcony.’ There’s just this positive and negative.

Leo Laporte There was a split. There were the people who remembered him as a pederast, as a child molester, who said ‘well why would you mourn the loss of this guy?’ and yet I mourn it, because I will never forget 1983 watching – you’re too young, but John you remember it, you must have been like 10 or 11?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, for me it was Thriller because I was in elementary school and Thriller came out.

Leo Laporte You see before Thriller, well no I guess it was roughly the same timeframe, but it was the 25th anniversary of Motown at the Apollo Theatre. Jackson comes out, does Billy Jean. So I guess it was Thriller. And that’s the first time we saw the moonwalking, threw his hat, it was electrifying and that’s what I remember. I don’t remember the –

John C. Dvorak Yeah and everyone was doing the moon walk after that or trying to for the next two or three years.

Leo Laporte Right.

Brian Brushwood Oh how many shabby moon walks do we all have to endure?

Leo Laporte Yeah, yeah. Do you know how to do as part of your scam school; do you know how to do a moon walk?

Brian Brushwood I know how to make other people try to do moon walks and laugh at them.

Leo Laporte Did you see that Jackson had a patent?

Brian Brushwood On the moon walk?

Leo Laporte No he had patent on shoes that had a special grip on the bottom that you would slot in to an attachment on the stage that would allow you to kind of slide up to it, be suddenly gripped and be able to lean all the way forward.

Brian Brushwood You know why he didn’t sell many of those?

Leo Laporte Why?

Brian Brushwood Because he didn’t have Billy Mays selling it for him.


John C. Dvorak You’re getting there, you’re not quite there.

Leo Laporte He never stopped shouting.

John C. Dvorak You haven’t nailed it yet.

Leo Laporte I think that’s pretty good.

John C. Dvorak It’s close.

Leo Laporte I think I sound just like Billy Mays! ‘IT’S AMAZING!’

John C. Dvorak So let’s get to some real news stories.

Brian Brushwood By the way, is it true I think the plan is on Monday to celebrate Billy Mays, everybody is going to type in all caps for the entire day.


Brian Brushwood You know what, it is getting better, it’s growing on me, your Billy Mays is getting better.

John C. Dvorak I can’t stop this obviously.

Leo Laporte Alright, pick a story, any story John.

John C. Dvorak Well let’s do Guy Kawasaki since we talked about Twitter, guy kaka –

Leo Laporte Guy kakawhatty?

John C. Dvorak Guy kaba – story.

Leo Laporte We have not had a single drop of liquor. I want to tell everybody, no wine.

John C. Dvorak But that’s the problem with sugar. Anyway his twitter account was hijacked.

Leo Laporte Okay, everybody eat for a moment.

Brian Brushwood Well it doesn’t surprise me with –

John C. Dvorak Well that was fascinating. Let’s see what other stories we’ve got.

Leo Laporte Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Brian Brushwood Well I mean how scary is it, how often we give our twitter information to all these sketch you know the newest apps.

Leo Laporte Did he say how he got hijacked, had he fallen for a scam?

Brian Brushwood They assumed that that’s what it had to be, that he gave his info to some Trojan.

Leo Laporte Twitter has been non-stop and of course, because its a target.

John C. Dvorak Do you think that that shrimp looks like it’s safe to eat.

Brian Brushwood Looks delicious.

Leo Laporte Yeah I hope it’s safe to eat. Would you like some?

John C. Dvorak No. God no.

Leo Laporte I am sorry. I shouldn’t be eating while I am doing the show, but I didn’t have lunch yet, so.

John C. Dvorak No, that’s okay. You’re going to China, you’re going to be eating a lot.

Leo Laporte I don’t care I know. What kind of food – you been to China?

John C. Dvorak Oh, yeah.

Leo Laporte What kind of food do they have?

John C. Dvorak They got, let me think. They got Chinese food.

Leo Laporte Wait a minute, if I go to China and I say....

John C. Dvorak You will not get egg fu yung or chop suey.

Brian Brushwood Yeah and actually yeah, there’s that whole TED talk about how what we think of as Chinese food is totally bogus.

Leo Laporte Yeah, it’s American.

Brian Brushwood They go around, in fact she went around handing out fortune cookies and they were like ‘what the hell is this?’

John C. Dvorak Yeah well actually fortune cookies were invented in San Francisco. But the fact of the matter is –

Leo Laporte But can I go to Chinatown in China and have fortune cookies?

John C. Dvorak No.

Brian Brushwood Chinatown in China?

Leo Laporte Is there an Americantown in China?

Brian Brushwood The joke of Chinese food in the United States is that it actually is Chinese food from 1850, because all these coolies came over and they build the railroads and such and they did – and Chinese food is a living cuisine like French cuisine, Italian cuisine, it changes . And so from 1850 yeah they probably had egg fu yung or something like that, but that’s frozen in time in the USA and then you go to China, it is like holy crap this is unbelievable, this is nothing like ‘Chinese food’.

Leo Laporte So remember there was a szechuan fad and a hunan fad that swept through at least the Bay Area, I don’t know if it swept through all of America. But that would be more current Chinese food or no?

John C. Dvorak In those areas. The regionals are pretty distinctive.

Leo Laporte So where have you been?

John C. Dvorak I have been to Beijing, outside of Beijing. I have been to Szechuan. I have been to Xiamen. I have been to Shanghai.

Leo Laporte You’ve been a lot, you’ve been all over. Were these junkets, so you went to tech companies mostly or do you actually get to see..?

John C. Dvorak Well actually in Xiamen I went to – there’s an art dealer there that I had to visit.

Leo Laporte Did you get little Japanese, Chinese lions that go on either side of your –?

John C. Dvorak No he makes copies of Monets and things like that.

Leo Laporte Oh he’s a copier.

John C. Dvorak Outstanding by the way.

Brian Brushwood Right. So I never thought I would be the one to tell Dvorak to get back to the – can we talk about TECH please?

Leo Laporte Oh man! So Guy Kawasaki’s Twitter got hacked.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, I don’t know that there’s much say about it outside of I think it’s kind of crazy that we’re still just blindly giving out our log ins to every site.

Leo Laporte I think you said that.

John C. Dvorak Okay.

Brian Brushwood I tell you what I would really love to talk about is Amazon stepping up and laying a smack down on the state of North Carolina.

Leo Laporte I like this. It this a wild story? So North Carolina is not the only state, a number of states have proposed taxing, not – you’d think of course they’re going for taxing the purchases, the sales tax off of Amazon and that’s certainly one of the things they want to get. What they are talking about is taxing –

John C. Dvorak Sure. We’re not being taxed enough in this country.

Leo Laporte Right. Tax protestor John C. Dvorak, ladies and gentlemen. I’m happy to pay my taxes.

John C. Dvorak You know we pay over 55% of our income in taxes in one way or another.

Brian Brushwood Wow.

Leo Laporte Yeah, I believe that, yeah. Should I be outraged by that?

John C. Dvorak No if you’re happy with that, that’s fine.

Leo Laporte Well am I getting my money’s worth?

John C. Dvorak Well, let’s see. We are paying that kind of money and the state of California is what, 20 billion in debt?

Leo Laporte California not doing so good.

John C. Dvorak And we have a 10% personal income tax in California plus property tax plus 10% sales tax and we’re in debt. How’s that work?

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak Where’s the money going?

Leo Laporte That’s a good question.

John C. Dvorak It’s going into somebody’s pockets.

Leo Laporte Why are we so broke?

Anyway apparently Amazon is upset because the state of North Carolina is considering, hasn’t been – it’s expected to be passed any day now. Hasn’t been passed.

Brian Brushwood Not anymore. I guarantee it’s not going to happen now. They – here’s the way it works. In 1992, U.S. Supreme Court ruled in the Quill decision that it was unconstitutional for a state to make another company that has no warehouses, no any, no presence in the state…

Leo Laporte They don’t do business in the state.

Brian Brushwood Right, they don’t do business in the state. They can’t tell Amazon, because Amazon’s is not located in North Carolina to withhold state taxes and pay it in. Now strangely, everyone who buys on Amazon actually does owe sales tax to the state of North Carolina.

Leo Laporte You’re supposed to. In California there’s a line on our state tax return says ‘did you buy anything online? How much? And pay the sales tax.’

Brian Brushwood Right, only they call it a use tax and so rather than trying to harp on their own citizens and enforce the law as it’s written, what they would love to do trick Amazon into doing all the dirty work for them, but they can’t do that because they don’t have any warehouses and no business there. But then they say ‘aha! Some people are part of their affiliate program, that they get paid, so that’s a presence in our state and so now we want you to install, to withhold all the sales tax and pay it to us.’

Leo Laporte So the way that Amazon responds is to close the affiliate program.

Brian Brushwood Yeah to shut down, to say ‘you’re all fired. You’re all out.’

Leo Laporte Now we make, we don’t make a huge amount of money. We make maybe 8 or 900, but how much do we make in our affiliate program Coleen? Maybe 1000 a month, something like that? It’s not an insignificant amount of money.

John C. Dvorak That’s a lot.

Leo Laporte And I think there are people who probably you know I –

John C. Dvorak I’ve never made a nickel.

Leo Laporte Well, you got a link to your –

John C. Dvorak Oh is that how it works?

Leo Laporte Yeah. So if you go to, we have the TWiT Pix. Whenever we talk about a product calling Pix one a day and puts it up on the site, not all of them are Amazon, but when they are we use our affiliate code and why not? And it can be a lot of money.

Brian Brushwood Well, here’s the thing is if you are somebody who is working out of North Carolina and the letter, you know the letter is interesting, it’s like ‘hey, sorry you’re fired.’

Leo Laporte Let me read it to you.

“We are writing from the Amazon Associates Program to notify you that your associate’s account has been closed as of June 26. This is a direct result of the unconstitutional tax collection scheme expected to be passed any day now by the North Carolina State Legislature and signed by the Governor. As a result we will no longer pay any referral fees for customers referred to or after June 26.”

Brian Brushwood This is so brilliant because it does two things. First of all…

Leo Laporte This is awful lot of people.

Brian Brushwood It completely pisses everyone off and second of all takes away the prize, to where now even if they pass it, what are they going to get?

Leo Laporte ‘We don’t do business in your state.’

Brian Brushwood Because yeah ‘we don’t do any…’

John C. Dvorak It’s a win, win,

Brian Brushwood …’referral.’ By the way I…

John C. Dvorak Bezos is a genius.

Brian Brushwood I wanted to find out the story, because I was trying to get the real story on whether or not you are supposed to pay your own taxes, because that’s what I have always heard. So I googled sales tax online and I found an article that says ‘get ready to pay taxes on online purchases. The free ride’s over’ and it was – the date line was October 2003.

Leo Laporte This – I think it went out before then. I mean I have seen this e-mail year in year out since the Internet’s been around.

“In the event North Carolina repeals its tax collections scheme, we would certainly be happy to re-open our associates program in North Carolina residence. We have enjoyed working with you and we wish you all the best in your future.”

John C. Dvorak I can assure you there is a ton of – because North Carolina is kind of a hippy state.

Leo Laporte Oh are they pissed. Oh pissed.

John C. Dvorak This is for ton of people that are affiliated people.

Leo Laporte What’s interesting according to web 771 Amazon tried to do the same thing in New York but kind of at the last moment decided not to. New York’s too big a state and now they’re paying sales tax. You pay sales tax if you buy in New York according to our chatter.

Brian Brushwood Well, this has to be some kind of…

Leo Laporte North Carolina is small enough that they probably could pull this and –

Brian Brushwood Well yeah and if it works here, then they got a chance to keep fighting it as state by state does it, but if doesn’t work here it’s, yeah, all over.

Leo Laporte Wow.

John C. Dvorak Well, it’s an interesting for the…it doesn’t apply to companies without the affiliate program though.

Leo Laporte Well and that’s the question.

John C. Dvorak They have been trying to tax – everybody wants to tax everybody. I mean it’s ridiculous.

Leo Laporte Well let me. Let’s be – let me be fair. Let me say…

John C. Dvorak You are not being fair already.

Leo Laporte …if you’re. Oh I am going to be fair. If I’m a bookstore down the street, I have to pay sales taxes. I have to collect sales taxes I should say.

John C. Dvorak Do you know why? Because you have plumbing, you have streets in front of your store, you have sidewalks that need to be maintained.

Leo Laporte Amazon uses –

John C. Dvorak You have people that are – needed to be protected by the police in case somebody robs your store.

Leo Laporte So you say because they don’t do business there’s no reason for them to help the state collect sales tax. Nevertheless that sales tax is owed. It’s not like I am paying sales tax.

Brian Brushwood Yeah but that’s just it.

John C. Dvorak I don’t think it should be owed. I think as far as I am concerned unless the store is doing business and they got the protection of the police, they got a fire department, all these. That’s where the taxes go. So I’m Amazon in some other state. I am giving you money for what? You’re not protecting me, you got no police in front of my store. You got no sidewalk, you got no streets, you are not maintaining anything. I am already paying the state that I’m in, why do I have to pay you too?

Leo Laporte You are not paying though, that’s the point, is if I buy a book from Amazon, pay no sales tax.

John C. Dvorak No but I’m paying corporate taxes and all the other little things.

Leo Laporte But doesn’t it give brick and mortar stores a disadvantage? Isn’t it putting mom and pop stores out of business because Amazon is 10% cheaper just because you don’t have to pay sales tax?

John C. Dvorak Well even if there is a sales tax, they are cheaper.

Leo Laporte So they are doubly cheaper. So how am I supposed to survive as a mom and pop store? It drives business out of the state.

John C. Dvorak Go online.

Leo Laporte Yeah it means everybody goes out of state.

John C. Dvorak No, everybody goes online.

Leo Laporte It’s – well that’s what I was saying.

John C. Dvorak Well maybe they’re taxing too much in the first place. Let’s take a look at the little mom and pop store. They’re being taxed to death by their local governments. They are being – especially in California being taxed to death by the state. They got an onerous sales tax that’s around 10%. Maybe if we gave them a break here instead of trying to drive them out of business maybe we should blame the governments instead of blaming some company.

Leo Laporte No, actually you’ve got a good point. I mean it is going to drive business out of the state. It’s probably a contrary in…

John C. Dvorak Well, that’s why Oakland’s going bankrupt.

Leo Laporte Right.

John C. Dvorak They’ve driven all the small industries that’s in Oakland out of Oakland. Now it’s just nothing but just residentials and they got no money.

Leo Laporte Anyway.

John C. Dvorak I could go on.

Brian Brushwood No sales tax at all in New Hampshire. That’s pretty weird.

Leo Laporte How do they survive?

Brian Brushwood Well, one of the things they do, is if you are an idiot who climbs up a tree and gets stuck and they come and rescue you, they send you a bill.

Leo Laporte They charge you.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, they send you a bill.

Leo Laporte Good!

Brian Brushwood It’s like what are you going to say? ‘Oh no, no thanks, I am fine.’

Leo Laporte Good. Charge them. Well that’s, it’s an interesting story. Let’s move on. We have other stories. Actually we’ll get to them in just a second. I don’t why I have a recipe for Peking duck on my screen.

John C. Dvorak Oh you are going to have some great Peking duck. You going to Beijing?

Leo Laporte Yeah. I am going to go – what is the name of that restaurant like three stories tall, where was it invented?

John C. Dvorak No, that’s where it was invented that’s a different place than wherever you go.

Leo Laporte Where should I go?

John C. Dvorak There’s two places in Beijing that have Peking duck. One is the place where it was invented where people say ‘ah it’s a tourist trap.’ It’s great. You should go there anyway.

Leo Laporte I will go there.

John C. Dvorak Then there’s this place in the middle of Old Town that is just the shabbiest dive you’ve been..

Leo Laporte That’s where I want to go.

John C. Dvorak That place has got the great Peking duck everybody goes to.

Leo Laporte Do you know the name?

John C. Dvorak I have a photo of it. I’ll send it to you.

Leo Laporte Oh that’s where I want to go. I want to go the shabby places.

John C. Dvorak Everybody knows about it.

Leo Laporte Yeah, I will just ask. You know I have already got an invite from the Beijing Linux users group.

John C. Dvorak They’ll take you.

Leo Laporte They say ‘We are expats. We know everything great. Don’t go on a tour. We’ll take you on a tour.’

John C. Dvorak Yeah, they’re right.

Brian Brushwood Dude, how awesome is that? To have an international fan base to take care of you?

John C. Dvorak Yeah, the drawback of course is they’re Linux guys.

Leo Laporte Wait a minute. In the States –

John C. Dvorak In Beijing, oh brother!

Leo Laporte In the States’ programmers live on Hunan food. What did they live on China? Probably Big Macs and KFC.

Brian Brushwood Hopefully.

Leo Laporte It was his son that Twittered dthat he passed away.

Brian Brushwood I saw that in the chat room but I didn’t want to believe it.

Leo Laporte Young Billy Mays.

Brian Brushwood That sounds too –

John C. Dvorak It doesn’t sound right.

Brian Brushwood That sounds…

Leo Laporte ‘Dad just passed.’

Brian Brushwood It sounds like ‘my daddy did this as a kid’ –

John C. Dvorak What did he do, I woke up today, my dad just passed, let me go Twitter?

Leo Laporte My dad passed, let me go Twitter.

Brian Brushwood You know what?! ‘These kids today!’

Leo Laporte My daughter’s got a Twitter. I could see – I could totally see her going on…

John C. Dvorak She probably wants to.

Leo Laporte Yeah. ‘Dad just died. I wonder if I’ll get the car.’ I could have totally see this. Wait a minute let’s hear –

[Audio Plays] making sure that she gets off to her flight and okay and everything else. She’s not here, but she’s somewhere else.

Leo Laporte Wait a minute is that, that’s his son?

Brian Brushwood I don’t think that’s Billy Mays’ son!

[Audio Plays] One of my followers says, of course I’m following this person back, I forgot who it was, anyway, says ‘hey was it about Billy Mays?’ and my response was ‘no.’ Then I happened to look to the right and saw that the number one hash tag was RIP Billy Mays. He died. It was reported by none other than his son of – in his Twitter page called…

Leo Laporte He looked just like his dad.

[Audio Plays] Young Billy Mays.

Leo Laporte I don’t think this is true. I don’t buy it.

Brian Brushwood Apparently, it’s like swollen to 4,000 followers. I am not – and again this is the terrible person thinking scam here, but it seems to me like that would be an effective way to get an awful lot of Twitter followers very quickly –

John C. Dvorak Absolutely. I am liking this guy.

Leo Laporte He’s 50 years old. I guess he could have a grown son.

John C. Dvorak Yeah but I still think it’s [indiscernible]

Leo Laporte Look, look, I mean look at this wait a minute now. Let’s look at the picture. I think he’s painted the beard on. I don’t think that that’s…I don’t know is that, is that…

John C. Dvorak It’s a throat beard. He’s a Linux guy.

Brian Brushwood He’s a Linux guy.

Leo Laporte Let’s see. Well maybe this really is, yeah I guess it is.

Brian Brushwood So how far did they go? It only goes back like seven hours. See what his oldest – he’s up to 8,000 now.

John C. Dvorak Not bad.

Brian Brushwood Oh man. Somebody was watching. Somebody caught the first draft to this and immediately ran with it.

Leo Laporte See there’s a real Billy Mays –

Brian Brushwood And if I am wrong I apologise.

Leo Laporte Real Billy Mays was his – was the real Billy Mays. So it could be his dad, it could be somebody who is pretending to be Billy Mays. Somebody named Billy Mays who said he was young Billy Mays.

John C. Dvorak Yeah or it could be a lot of other things. Let’s go to the THErealDVORAK and see if I have been hijacked. THErealDVORAK, see if I’ve been hijacked.

Leo Laporte This is kind of sad. This is Billy Mays’ Twitter account and this is his last post.

Brian Brushwood Oh that’s his last tweet. Oh that’s dreadful.

John C. Dvorak That’s where he had his close call landing.

Leo Laporte In fact they think that might be what caused the problem. He says that he had a close call landing in Tampa. The tires blew out on landing, stuck in the plane on the runway. You can always count on U.S. Air.

Brian Brushwood You know it’s morbid stuff like this that drives your – I had a…

Leo Laporte Wait a minute now, he says getting ready to fly back to Tampa from Philly. Monday is the big day, hip replacement number three.

John C. Dvorak Wow. That’s bad.

Brian Brushwood Wow.

Leo Laporte Anyway.

Brian Brushwood I’m a little depressed now –

John C. Dvorak So it actually kind of makes – kind of makes some sense that he wouldn’t have a seat belt on if he’s going to get his hip, maybe his hip was like killing him or something, he couldn’t put a belt on perhaps

Leo Laporte So and then maybe bumped his head. This is the – this is the theory – boy this is really ridiculous.

John C. Dvorak Now we are just a bunch of schlums.

Leo Laporte Rumor loggers. What does THErealDVORAK say? Now Curry seems to be missing. He didn’t die, did he? Adam Curry has passed? Wait a minute I want to Twitter that. Wait a minute I want to be the first to Twitter that.

John C. Dvorak He hasn’t – he didn’t show up, we were going to do the show this morning –

Leo Laporte Had he bumped his head?

John C. Dvorak What are you giving poor Adam a bad time for? Noticed I got the green logo though.

Leo Laporte You do and it says green which is kind of a little…

John C. Dvorak Just in case people

Leo Laporte It’s a little concrete.

John C. Dvorak In case people were color blind. They would be able to see that it was green by reading it.

Leo Laporte Are you mocking?

John C. Dvorak No, I am not. That’s the joke of it. I just thought it would be kind of a cool logo but then people think that I am just sarcastic.

Leo Laporte I am going blue for Billy Mays.

John C. Dvorak I think we should go blue for Billy.

Leo Laporte Is blue the color of OxiClean? You use OxiClean.

Brian Brushwood He’s usually wearing blue in most of the infomercials.

John C. Dvorak Let’s go blue for Billy. I’ll change mine to blue if you do.

Leo Laporte All right, I will go blue.

Brian Brushwood I will go blue.

John C. Dvorak Because I think the Iranian thing’s over.

Brian Brushwood Hey speaking of which, actually that’s – back to Michael Jackson. They were talking about, they were talking about –

Leo Laporte Thank goodness.

Brian Brushwood Michael Jackson…

John C. Dvorak Sorry ladies and gentlemen, sorry. I really – next week we’ll have a good show.

Brian Brushwood Michael Jackson was like the most sweeping topic on all of Twitter, and they said 15% of all tweets for a while were Michael Jackson related. And the most Iran had been at was 5%.

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak Well, there you have it.

Leo Laporte And they were doing 5000 tweets a minute…

Brian Brushwood Right, I know! And what’s funny is they are talking about what a triumph this is. I’m like, guys; this is not something you should be terribly proud of.

Leo Laporte It’s not a triumph. Okay. Odds that Billy Mays beat Michael Jackson?

Brian Brushwood Oh Very low.

Leo Laporte You think?

Brian Brushwood Very low.

John C. Dvorak I don’t think so.

Leo Laporte Not a lot of twitting over Billy?

John C. Dvorak There is a lot but Jackson was out of control.

Leo Laporte Let me just see if Billy is a trending topic.

Brian Brushwood Oh, I’m sure it is yeah.

Leo Laporte Oh Yeah. R.I.P. Billy Mays. Good lord, there is only one Michael Jackson on all the trending topics.

John C. Dvorak So let’s talk about Steve Job showing back up at the company.

Leo Laporte I will in a second, as soon as I do this ad which I’ve been trying to do…

John C. Dvorak Oh you haven’t done – oh, ok. Well I guess we’ll take a break.

Brian Brushwood Have we been on a break all this time?

Leo Laporte No, no, no, we moved on, this is…

John C. Dvorak It’s like a morning zoo.

Brian Brushwood So what do I really…where’s my cowbell?

Leo Laporte All we need is some – is a girl that laughs the whole time and we’re set.

Leo Laporte Colleen, come in here and just laugh at anything.

John C. Dvorak Just laugh at everything we say.

Leo Laporte Laugh insanely. This show brought to you by my friends at Citrix. Now, the GoToAssist is Citrix.

Brian Brushwood Oh Yeah.

Leo Laporte GoToMyPC is Citrix.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte GoToMeeting is the one I want to talk about right now which let’s you have meetings without all the business travel. Business travel is just, you know, a nightmare. Not only is it stressful, it can kill your profits so I want you to do more, save more, travel less with GoToMeeting. Here’s what you do, you got to right now, you can sign-up for a 30-day free trial; unlimited meetings for a month and compare it to the other guys. I got to say, easiest to set up, take you a minute to set up, in fact you could do it while I’m talking, You – a couple of clicks of the mouse and you’ve got it installed on your system. Now whenever you need to have a meeting you could be on the phone with somebody and say, hold on let me just – you go to, say start a meeting and boom you say, here’s the meeting ID, suddenly they are seeing your computer on their screen.

So they’re seeing your computer on their screen. So they can see the PowerPoint, they can see the – it’s Mac too, so they can see the Keynote presentation, they can see the drawings, the spreadsheets, the slides. Whatever it is that you’re trying to explain, they can see on their screen. It just – it’s really great for meetings. We use it now on Maxwell’s House because Ray Maxwell has a lot of illustrations so he can show them, and if you’ve seen it you know how clear it is and how crisp it is and how fast it is. The pointer’s nice and big, you can really illustrate with it.

Of course, we use it all the time off the air, we use it for meetings with – well we just had a meeting with Telos over our new mixer system, they showed us everything they were going to do it was fantastic., I want to you to try it absolutely free, as many meetings as you want for as long as you want for 49 bucks a month but your first month is free so give it a shot., we thank them so much for their support.

What’s Dvorak up to in the other room? He’s wandered off. Did you just kill my dog?

John C. Dvorak No, I just put your dog out –

Brian Brushwood Out to pasture. He’s got a big field, he’s running around.

Leo Laporte That’s what my mom says.

John C. Dvorak Leo’s got the cutest dog.

Leo Laporte It’s a cute dog. Isn’t it?

John C. Dvorak Oh Yeah. What kind of dog is that?

Leo Laporte It’s a Papillon.

John C. Dvorak Oh Papillon.

Leo Laporte If you look at Papillons on Wikipedia they list famous Papillons and he’s one of them.

John C. Dvorak He is?

Leo Laporte Ozzy the Papillon, yeah. He’s famous.

John C. Dvorak Why is he famous?

Leo Laporte Because I own him! It’s kind of geek fame…

Brian Brushwood So in the chat room they were asking if Steve Jobs, would he be eating chopped liver at Passover?

Leo Laporte Oh that’s bad. So you know we speculated last week that it probably was Apple that – we never did find out – it probably was Apple that leaked this story. But now a week later it’s Apple. Right?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Wall Street Journal got it from Apple, obviously.

John C. Dvorak Sure.

Leo Laporte Yeah. There’s just no question. And it couldn’t be better timing; talk about Governor Sanford. I mean Apple skated on this…

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte …their stock price has gone up, they skated on this.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, they – “oh, by the way, I got a new liver” and the first words out of his mouth are, “we sold a million iPhones.” Like, literally he gives a press release; that was his first statement.

Leo Laporte Yeah, he’s happy. So apparently he – now I don’t know if he’s been there every day or he just made this token appearance on Monday, CNBC says he looked fit, hale and hearty. You know who CNBC is though? Goldman, Jim Goldman’s the [indiscernible] guy.

John C. Dvorak Oh.

Brian Brushwood Check this out…

Leo Laporte Remember Jim?

John C. Dvorak I know Jim, yeah.

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak He does – I’ve been on CNBC with him.

Leo Laporte Yeah, he’s a nice guy. But I have to say he’s a little bit in Apple pocket.

John C. Dvorak Oh, he’s a total Apple’s pocket guy.

Leo Laporte Yeah, yeah. So…

John C. Dvorak But I like him, he’s nice.

Leo Laporte It’s kind of – you kind of have the feeling like they – that Katie Cotton from Apple, the PR woman calls him up and says “Jim why don’t you come over, we’ll have lunch at the cafeteria on Monday.” And they are having lunch. “Oh look Jim!” “Oh hello Steve!” “Steve, good to see you.”

John C. Dvorak What a coincidence.

Leo Laporte What an amazing – who would have thought it?

Brian Brushwood But here’s what totally shocked me. I didn’t know, but they’ve been doing liver transplants for almost 40 years. They do like 7,000 a year and 90% of them take and in the cases that they don’t take they just line you up and give you a different liver.

John C. Dvorak The liver is amazing. It’s the only organ we have that regenerates.

Leo Laporte Yeah, doctor mom who knows a lot about this, she has been our consultant all along on this, says, there’s no reason he can’t be back at work as long as he wants, just as long as he keeps to his medication.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, I couldn’t believe it. They – I went to some guide that says, “So you’re getting a liver transplant” and they said pretty much after the transplant, a week, as little as a week you could out discharged from the hospital. A week to three weeks they say.

John C. Dvorak Okay so where is the photos?

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte We have – we have one photo right here.

John C. Dvorak No the photos of –

Leo Laporte This is Steve Jobs.

Brian Brushwood Oh my God!

Leo Laporte This is rock and roll heaven.

John C. Dvorak Oh my god this is the death watch photo.

Leo Laporte I’m going make this my desktop wallpaper.

Brian Brushwood Oh my goodness.

Leo Laporte It’s got Farrah Fawcett, Ed McMahon.

John C. Dvorak Are you going to put a link for people?

Leo Laporte This is from 4chan.

Brian Brushwood They should have the Ghostbusters behind them. Oh that’s terrible.

Leo Laporte Billy Mays, David Carradine and Mikey. That was a busy day at those pearly gates.

John C. Dvorak All we need in the back is Darth Vader, and then we got it made.

Leo Laporte Isn’t that a great picture. That’s my wallpaper right now. I’m right clicking on it.

John C. Dvorak I‘m still telling you there’s one to go. One more pitchman.

Leo Laporte Oh John has a theory, okay so tell – explain this theory.

John C. Dvorak The theory is that, you know they come in threes all these celebrity deaths and everyone says, well you know the number doesn’t add up. But it does add up if you think of Carradine, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson is three celebrities and Ed McMahon who began as a pitchman not unlike Billy Mays…

Brian Brushwood

And ended as a pitchman.

John C. Dvorak …and ended as a pitchman selling stuff, you know the home sweepstakes or those publishers clearing houses.

Brian Brushwood And just recently the – give him your gold. Cash4Gold.

John C. Dvorak Right, the gold guy, yeah. So he’s a pitchman, Billy Mays is a pitchman and so we got one more pitchman to go. That’s the theory. So there’s a bunch of them lined up, I mean there’s a lot of old pitchmen out there.

Leo Laporte Hi, I am Leo Laporte for GoToMeeting.

Brian Brushwood Are we going to skip the ads for the rest of the podcast?

John C. Dvorak Well, you’re to China, anything can happen over in China.

Leo Laporte Well you know I’m flying an Airbus A330-300, you remember the last time you heard about that?

John C. Dvorak Yeah, that’s the one that just blew up in the mid-air.

Leo Laporte Air France. Thank you. The latest on that by the way, I don’t think they’re going to find the black boxes because they got 30 days before the beacon dies.

John C. Dvorak They heard the beacon.

Leo Laporte They heard the beacon?

John C. Dvorak Yeah, they heard the beacon maybe two, three days ago.

Leo Laporte They still haven’t found it though. It’s very deep there.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, well they can get it. Maybe they don’t want to get it.

Leo Laporte Ooh.

John C. Dvorak Anyway.

Leo Laporte Is this like an episode of No Agenda?

John C. Dvorak Oh, you listen once in a while. Aha! The truth has been revealed!

Brian Brushwood Dun dun duuuh.

Leo Laporte Maybe there is a conspiracy, huh? It’s the Illuminati. Air France doesn’t want to get it. So they think, though, the hypothesis and absent the black boxes they can’t really be sure, is that it was the computer systems that failed, they got in turbulence, they were in thunderstorm, they were flying very high. If you get too high a speed in that situation you can have real problems, too low a speed also real problems. They believe – it’s a fly-by-wire jet, they believe that the automated systems failed, the plane got going too fast, and started breaking up. And from all the evidence from what they’ve heard and what they think happened, this is the…

John C. Dvorak Well it’s possible, I mean something happened.

Leo Laporte So I am flying over the Pacific in about –

John C. Dvorak Which is a long haul.

Leo Laporte Hell of a long haul.

John C. Dvorak But you’re flying out of SFO?

Leo Laporte SFO to Tokyo, to Narita.

John C. Dvorak Urgh.

Leo Laporte What you mean “urgh”? What you mean? What are doing here? What?

John C. Dvorak You should be – you know you should do the flight to make, for anyone out there who wants to go to China. Get into Vancouver, Canada, take the Air Canada jumper over to Shanghai, it’s like seven hours because it’s – and it’s almost all over land, it’s a really nice flight. It’s filled of course with every Chinese –

Leo Laporte I hate Air Canada though.

John C. Dvorak Well they have some other carriers that go from Vancouver to Shanghai, it’s a really nice flight; it’s a good flight. Short. Your flight is a long haul.

Leo Laporte It is short! It’s taking me 12 hours to get to Narita.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, that’s a long wait.

Leo Laporte And then another four hours to get to Beijing.

John C. Dvorak You’ll be on the plane for forever. You just take a quick flight up to Vancouver.

Leo Laporte How could it only be seven hours?

John C. Dvorak It’s like seven, eight hours max to Shanghai from there because they’re both way up. When you’re both up close, here’s your globe, it goes up, they’re real close together and then you just fly to Shanghai; you’re in China.

Leo Laporte But I’m going to Beijing.

John C. Dvorak Shanghai to Beijing would be another couple, maybe two and a half hours.

Leo Laporte Yeah. I’m going to stick with mine.

John C. Dvorak But you want to stop in Shanghai; it’s the greatest city in the world.

Leo Laporte Is it really?

John C. Dvorak Oh man.

Leo Laporte What makes Shanghai so cool?

John C. Dvorak It’s just – it’s modern, it’s jumping, it’s got the best restaurants.

Leo Laporte More exciting than the Hong Kong now?

John C. Dvorak Oh there’s no comparison, Hong Kong is like Zurich, it’s a very banking-oriented, very expensive; Shanghai is one-tenth the price of everything.

Leo Laporte Oh, now I’m sad.

John C. Dvorak There’s no comparison.

Leo Laporte Well, I’m going to have to go back to Shanghai, is there a Linux users group in China?

John C. Dvorak Oh you’d better – I’m sure there is. And they all have throat beards.

Brian Brushwood Throat beards? Is that the hallmark of the Linux user?

John C. Dvorak It’s what somebody said in the chat room.

Brian Brushwood So good news; how about this Hulu ad revenues for premium content like The Simpsons?

Leo Laporte This is exciting me.

Brian Brushwood Very exciting.

Leo Laporte For the first time you pay more for an ad on Hulu than you do for an ad on TV, so if you want to buy The Simpsons on TV it’s cheaper than buying it on Hulu.

Brian Brushwood Which is how it should have been from the beginning; it’s specific, targeted…

Leo Laporte It’s very interesting.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte But it’s good news for my programme.

John C. Dvorak Now is it cheaper overall or just cheaper on a CPM basis?

Brian Brushwood CPM.

Leo Laporte Oh, yeah, of course.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Of course, because far fewer people are watching The Simpsons on Hulu.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, but the CPM is higher.

Leo Laporte But they are more valuable.

John C. Dvorak Right.

Leo Laporte They are more valuable because there’s fewer ads, it’s a destination program. If you’re watching The Simpsons on Hulu you went there to see that.

Brian Brushwood Right, and if nothing else –

Leo Laporte You’re not asleep.

Brian Brushwood The metrics are so much more reliable. You know I was a Nielsen family and totally gamed the system –

Leo Laporte Did you? Wait a minute, let’s hear about this.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, they made us a Nielsen family, this happened right after –

John C. Dvorak Who’s us?

Brian Brushwood My family, my wife and I and our kids.

Leo Laporte Aren’t you like, bound not to talk about this for seven years?

Brian Brushwood Ah…okay. What I meant was my neighbor, Ryan Rushwood, he was a Nielsen family and this happened right after the Adult Swim fiasco with the Aqua Teen Hunger Force in Boston where they thought they were terrorist weapons and they…

Leo Laporte Right, it was just promotional stuff.

Brian Brushwood …they threw the hammer at these guys.

Leo Laporte Yeah.

Brian Brushwood Right. And so I was so mad at that, that I just put that all I did, all I watched all week was Aqua Teen Hunger Force, every night from 9 to 10, through 9 to 10.

Leo Laporte So you got a diary?

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte You didn’t get a people meter? And that’s the…

John C. Dvorak You had no box?

Brian Brushwood No, no, no, no, no, they just picked it and sent us postcards and say, here’s a buck, why don’t you do this, and we filled out the thing for two weeks.

Leo Laporte This is why, precisely why they moved out to automated systems like the people meter, in fact they’re doing it in radio now.

Brian Brushwood Well they should. But even then you still have inconsistencies because based on sample size and demographic and…

Leo Laporte Well that was a problem with TechTV is that we had such a small audience that literally – I’m not kidding, literally five people in the sample were watching TechTV, so if one person got sick, went on vacation, we lost 20% in our ratings numbers! It’s not a good system. But that was people meters.

John C. Dvorak Well it’s not a good system with highly targeted audiences like TechTV.

Leo Laporte It isn’t, it isn’t.

John C. Dvorak It’s good for like the major networks.

Leo Laporte It’s good for Seinfeld.

John C. Dvorak It’s good for the big boys.

Leo Laporte You know five people go on vacation, it doesn’t kill Seinfeld’s ratings. If five people go on vacation that happen to watch TechTV there’s nobody watching.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, you get the asterisk.

Leo Laporte Yeah, so television programs such as Simpsons and CSI are for the first time commanding higher advertising rates, not just, at The premium rates are mainly for shows that rank among the most watched by Nielsen. So you have to do well on TV first and then you’re going to get the premium rates on the web.

Brian Brushwood The other – I mean are two reasons why it should be more expensive; first of all you get better metrics; you know that – who’s watching and how often. And they are actually watching the ads unlike on regular TV, you don’t know if somebody is getting up, going to the bathroom. At 15 seconds you don’t have enough time to do that when you’re watching stuff on Hulu, you just sit through it, or I do most of the time. And also you know that they are not TiVoing to jump forward through anything.

Leo Laporte Prime time audience shrank 3.6% last season. So they are looking for ways to make up that – yeah it’s really bad.

John C. Dvorak Well, of course the programming sucks. What’s on? I wouldn’t know.

Leo Laporte Well, Simpsons and CSI

John C. Dvorak That’s about it.

Leo Laporte I think this is –

John C. Dvorak Although I like NCIS a lot too.

Leo Laporte Is that the one with Jeff Goldblum?

John C. Dvorak No, no, that’s – that’s Law and Order.

Leo Laporte Did you read that he died?

John C. Dvorak Law and order, that’s Law and Order Special –

Leo Laporte Special Victims Unit.

John C. Dvorak No, no, no; Criminal Intent.

Leo Laporte I can’t follow all these acronyms. It’s worse than the computer industry. How many CSIs are there?

John C. Dvorak CSIs? 45. There’s 45. There is CSI Boston, CSI New York. There is CSI Chicago. There is CSI Las Vegas. There is CSI New Orleans. There is CSI Omaha. There is CSI Seattle. There is CSI San Francisco. I can go on.

Leo Laporte So get this. Marketers typically pay CPMs, that’s cost per thousand viewers, 20 to $40 for a primetime ad. I can’t believe that. That’s less than us.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte On the Simpsons they’re paying $60 CPMs. That’s still less than us.

John C. Dvorak Online?

Leo Laporte Online. Shh!

Brian Brushwood But you’ve been able to demonstrate value.

Leo Laporte Shh!

Brian Brushwood I mean there is a reason you are able to –

Leo Laporte We’re charging more than primetime TV!

John C. Dvorak Yeah, but we have like a really targeted audience. They’re a bunch of Linux users…

Leo Laporte No, you know what –

John C. Dvorak …and they all got throat beards.

Leo Laporte And that’s a very desirable demographic. No, people wouldn’t come back. We’ve had – most of our sponsors have been on for more than a year.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, yeah.

Leo Laporte People wouldn’t come back if it didn’t work.

Brian Brushwood It’s certainly been long enough that they know that they’re seeing a return on their investment for certain. But what’s interesting is, okay so here is my question. So let’s say this is good news and now –

John C. Dvorak Wait a minute, sorry, I have to make a correction. It’s neck beards.

Leo Laporte Yeah, what were you calling them?

Brian Brushwood Throat beards! I like throat beards better.

Leo Laporte It sounds like “arrrgh! I’ve got a throat beard.”

Leo Laporte It’s neck beards. I am so sorry.

Leo Laporte I knew what you meant. I kind of like “throat beard.”

John C. Dvorak I’m kind of liking it too.

Brian Brushwood Here is what terrifies me though is let’s say Hulu gets more and more successful because you got to remember also that the average Hulu program has 37 seconds of ads on it compared to they have these three 90 second breaks on broadcast television. What if Hulu gets popular enough that instead of these little 15-30 second ads once every 10 minutes –

Leo Laporte Then it doesn’t work.

Brian Brushwood They start – and it’s worse than doing like TiVo because now you’re stuck watching 90 seconds of ads and you can’t skip past it. I mean you’re getting it on demand like TiVo but you don’t get to jump the ads.

Leo Laporte Yeah, you know where you skip – you know how you skip past it?

Brian Brushwood How?

Leo Laporte Pirate Bay.

Brian Brushwood Exactly, I mean I’m told.

Leo Laporte That’s the real competition.

John C. Dvorak So you did eat the shrimp?

Leo Laporte Yeah, it was good. Euurgh! [Pantomimes dying in agony] I’m Leo Laporte and it’s been great. Bye!

Leo Laporte They are going to do a Pitchmen marathon on Wednesday by the way.

Brian Brushwood Are they really?

Leo Laporte Yeah.

Brian Brushwood Wow, that’s a little –

John C. Dvorak I don’t even know about this show, Pitchmen.

Brian Brushwood You know what’s funny is – oh! Pitchmen is awesome. It’s Billy Mays and his British counterpart, I forgot their names. But what’s funny is when you just said that, I though well that’s morbid but I don’t think it’s any more morbid than the fact that Michael Jackson’s tearing it up on the charts right now. I mean obviously people want to –

Leo Laporte No, it’s good business, good for business.

John C. Dvorak Oh brother.

Leo Laporte We’re going to raise our rates when I kick.

John C. Dvorak And have a TWiT Marathon.

Leo Laporte TWiT Marathon! We got a – we got 201 shows. I can just run them forever.

John C. Dvorak You could. You could be just like a Charles Schultz.

Brian Brushwood You know what you could do is you can actually just run your entire career over again, just from the beginning straight through –

Leo Laporte Re-run it. I got it all on hard drive on that shelf, baby. That shelf is gold right there.

Brian Brushwood Holy cow!

Leo Laporte Yeah, you didn’t believe me.

Brian Brushwood Wow!

Leo Laporte Yeah, that’s terabytes worth of video.

Brian Brushwood So Windows 7

Leo Laporte Yeah, the prices are out. Microsoft is not really cutting prices if you buy in a store after it comes out, October 22nd. But if you buy now, and I did –

John C. Dvorak You did?

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak You bought now?

Leo Laporte Yeah, $50.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, but that’s the Home crap edition

Leo Laporte Well what edition do you want, the Ultimate edition?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Pfft!

John C. Dvorak What?

Leo Laporte Wait a minute.

John C. Dvorak What did you go pfft for?

Leo Laporte What did you get?

John C. Dvorak What did I get? I got nothing.

Leo Laporte You got nothing. What did you get for Vista Ultimate? Nothing.

John C. Dvorak What did I get?

Leo Laporte Yeah, what more did you get in Vista Ultimate?

John C. Dvorak I don’t know because they never had the other ones.

Brian Brushwood You know what. I have both. I have Ultimate and the Home. And I have no idea what the difference is.

Leo Laporte I’ll tell you what you got. You’ve got Dreamscene, which allows the desk – the desktop, the desktop video. You got – there was – I mean it was crap, BitLocker. Do you use BitLocker?

John C. Dvorak What it that? I don’t know what it is.

Leo Laporte That’s right. You don’t use it

Brian Brushwood You know what. I’d know it if I had Songsmith.

Leo Laporte That’s the one, Songsmith.

Brian Brushwood That’s what Ultimate should have.

John C. Dvorak Songsmith there you go.

Leo Laporte No seriously, Ultimate was a complete failure in Vista. A lot of people spent $100 more for Ultimate –

John C. Dvorak Really?

Leo Laporte And got nothing. I mean what you got was ridiculous. I don’t think Ultimate is the way to go with 7. I think – the kind of the default version will be Windows Home Premium.

John C. Dvorak Well, I got a list here on my blog, if you want to have a look.

Leo Laporte Wow, he hasn’t done that in a while.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, I know.

Brian Brushwood And we don’t have any wine to drink.

Leo Laporte We’ve got diet cola. I’ve got Odwalla lemonade.

John C. Dvorak There is a thing on here that shows that it’s got this – the table, bring it up, you’ll see it.

Leo Laporte All right, Is that the – what is the address again?

John C. Dvorak

Leo Laporte Let me just type that – and then what?

John C. Dvorak Well, then you got to find this.

Leo Laporte And I have to scroll, scroll – who is that?

John C. Dvorak I think you have to go back a page.

Brian Brushwood All right, so my question is –

John C. Dvorak I don’t know, who is that?

Brian Brushwood Is the pricing just a pre-order or –

John C. Dvorak Oh! That’s Waxman.

Leo Laporte That’s Waxman. Wow, he’s attractive.

Brian Brushwood Have they determined the final retail prices yet because I know there is some talk about Windows should bring its prices down .

Leo Laporte Yes they have, not much, like 5%, 10%. It is actually very disappointing. But the only deal is – you’re going to get is if you purchase now at Amazon or Best Buy or a number of other retailers you get a pretty good break.

Brian Brushwood And that’s just the upgrade edition, right? It’s not a full install?

Leo Laporte Yeah, you have to be using Vista or XP. Oh it is!

John C. Dvorak There is, right at the bottom.

Leo Laporte At the bottom?

John C. Dvorak Click pic to embiggen.

Leo Laporte Oh my gosh! That’s a – you stole this from PC Magazine.

John C. Dvorak I didn’t steal it.

Leo Laporte Borrowed it.

John C. Dvorak It’s linked.

Leo Laporte PC world.

John C. Dvorak It’s a link.

Brian Brushwood Linked.

Leo Laporte So here is the deal. Good Lord.

John C. Dvorak So there is all the prices.

Leo Laporte Here is what you get in Ultimate. You get App Locker, BitLocker, Branch Cache, DirectAccess, Subsystem for UNIX-based Applications, the Multilingual User Pack and a virtual hard disk.

Brian Brushwood Ah, thank goodness.

John C. Dvorak For booting.

Brian Brushwood I’ve been waiting for that.

Leo Laporte Oh yeah, you could boot from a virtual hard drive. That’s a good thing.

John C. Dvorak Yes, no that is a good thing.

Leo Laporte So, but on the Windows Home Professional, you don’t get those. But you get everything else.

John C. Dvorak Wait, Windows Home Premium or Home Professional, did you get the Home Professional?

Leo Laporte Not Professional, no, no, no, for Premium it’s 49 bucks.

John C. Dvorak Okay you got –

Leo Laporte Oh! What else did I lose?

John C. Dvorak Oh, Home Basic is what you’ve got.

Leo Laporte No, I didn’t get Basic. You get Home Premium for $50. I am not going to get the encrypting file system, the location aware printing.

John C. Dvorak It’s called

Leo Laporte Truecrypt; free.

John C. Dvorak Free.

Leo Laporte And better. Remote desktop host. GoToMyPC.

Brian Brushwood You got GoToAssist, GoToMyPC.

Leo Laporte Presentation mode. I don’t even know what that is, Windows server domains, that’s for business don’t need that, Windows XP mode. Now that’s the one thing you might want!

John C. Dvorak Aha! XP mode.

Brian Brushwood He sits back so smug and satisfied.

John C. Dvorak There it is.

Leo Laporte I’ve got you, Laporte. XP mode. You’re not getting it.

Brian Brushwood Check and mate, sir.

John C. Dvorak Absolutely, you’re screwed. You don’t have XP mode.

Brian Brushwood Where are you without your XP now?

Leo Laporte There is a certain delicious irony in Microsoft charging extra so that you can run XP.

Brian Brushwood Speaking of charging extra –

John C. Dvorak That’s the way they operate.

Brian Brushwood There is a lot of talk like, I had an Apple fanboy claim that Snow Leopard and Windows 7 were roughly equivalent generational leaps forward and that Windows 7 should be $30 the way Snow Leopard is –

Leo Laporte I’m with them.

Brian Brushwood Really?

Leo Laporte …I’m with him, I agree with him, yes.

Brian Brushwood Wow.

Leo Laporte In fact, Paul and I on Windows Weekly talked a lot about this and we and I think we came down to the full version of Windows 7 should be 79 bucks, 89 bucks, it should not be as it is, $199, it just shouldn’t be that expensive.

Brian Brushwood So when you get the upgrade edition that means every time from now on, every time I want to wipe my hard drive and start again, I have to first install Vista and then install the upgrade?

Leo Laporte This is unclear but in the past you’ve been able to take your XP disc, stick it in and they’ll check it and then take it out, you don’t have to have it installed. But Microsoft has not said yet whether that will be.

Brian Brushwood Although that will be interesting if this rumor about the USB drives is true. I wonder how that handles, you may just have to type in the product code.

Leo Laporte So what’s that – what’s that story? Tell us about that?

Brian Brushwood Well, apparently you could get Windows 7…

Leo Laporte It’s a rumor.

Brian Brushwood A rumor, yes. The rumor is you can install on a thumb drive, which is really exiting because finally I can put an expensive piece of software in an even more awkward format than a CD, so I can lose it –

Leo Laporte You know why you want it on a thumb drive and the truth is you can do this yourself, but you want it for netbooks and other devices that don’t have CD ROMs or spindles, you know? And it’s great – you know, I’ve installed Windows 7 on all almost all my netbooks, it’s not a hard thing to do to put it on a thumb drive, but most normal users are not going to want to do that, you have to run some special software and –

Brian Brushwood You know the weird thing it actually, it actually makes me excited for the day when I could just finally have a subscription and it’d be like -- like with Steam, the way it is with videogames, where it manages everything and I never have to worry about anything and I just get online and –

Leo Laporte You know Microsoft would love to do that, because they could charge you yearly.

Brian Brushwood Well, weirdly, I’m actually okay with doing it now. I mean, I’m not – not as that being the only choice but I lose stuff. I lose stuff a lot.

Leo Laporte Like discs?

Brian Brushwood Yes. Yes, right.

Leo Laporte I’m sorry ¬- that stopped this cold, I don’t know. ¬¬¬¬¬¬¬

John C. Dvorak He said lost his thumb drive in his pants.

Leo Laporte That’s – is that a thumb drive?

John C. Dvorak Is that a thumb drive in your pants?

Leo Laporte Is that really a thumb drive you got there?

John C. Dvorak Or are you happy to see me?

Leo Laporte All right, we are going to take a little break here so you can absorb the implications of all that Brian Brushwood has just said, for a visit to; Audible of course, our fine sponsor, the folks that do all those audiobooks, we’re now I think up to 60,000 audiobooks and you can get two of them for free. Go to – you’re an Audible...

Brian Brushwood Oh, I love Audible, in fact I actually, a friend of mine made a bunch of recommendations and I got him started on Audible and I’ve got my recommendation for a book all lined up when you’re ready.

Leo Laporte You do?

Brian Brushwood Yes.

Leo Laporte Well, that’s fantastic, thank you Brian, well let me just quickly mention that when you sign up for the platinum account, which is what this twit2 URL does,, the platinum account is a two book a month account, that’s what I pay for, because I go through two books a month, I really like – in fact I just got 5 books on China to listen to on the plane and in China, I’m really looking forward –

Brian Brushwood Holy cow…

Leo Laporte Yes, a couple of biographies of Mao, one by, one short one by Jonathan Spence who was my professor at Yale and a long definitive that just came out a couple of years ago, it’s like the book about Mao, a short history of China and a history of the Long March, which I’m really interested in. But that’s probably not what you want to recommend. I bet you want to recommend, I hate people, kick loose from the jerks at work and get what you want, is that your book?

Brian Brushwood No, strangely it’s not. You may feel that way after you hear my recommendation.

Leo Laporte What is it?

Brian Brushwood It’s George R. R. Martin’s Song of Ice and Fire series.

Leo Laporte Love it. Got all five of them.

Brian Brushwood The guy who reads it is amazing.

Leo Laporte I agree.

Brian Brushwood Last time I was talking of Frank Muller, who’s since passed away but Roy Dotrice reads the first three books in the series and this is going to take up both your books, because you know crazy long it is, right?

Leo Laporte Oh, it’s like 30 or 40 hours.

Brian Brushwood But you know that it’s going to – the first book is called A Game of Thrones…

Leo Laporte Yes.

Brian Brushwood …and they have sold the license, they are already shooting it for HBO; it’s going to be –

Leo Laporte It’s got to be a mini series because you couldn’t do it in two hours.

Brian Brushwood Every book will be a season, so the first book, Game of Thrones, Season 1, they’ve already cast Tyrion Lannister, it’s going to be awesome.

Leo Laporte Be still my aching heart, this is a – this was a Sword and Laser pick, Veronica and Tom picked this; it – you know who loved this book, I had it on my iPod and Ros, who is rowing across the Pacific, she said, I never listen to this kind of book, I don’t like fantasy at all, she listened to it and she said can you get the rest of them?

Brian Brushwood I tell you, it’s infectious because it starts off; I’m not a wizards and dragons kind of guy…

Leo Laporte Oh it’s so good.

Brian Brushwood But the intrigue and politics and the way he writes about just something as simple as food is phenomenal and Roy Dotrice right up there with Frank Muller as far as audiobook readings…

Leo Laporte Let me play a little bit of Roy – reading; this is George R. R. Martin, A Game of Thrones, the first book of the Song of Ice and Fire series, there’s quite a few of these. This must be a quiet part of the book here.

John C. Dvorak Very quiet.

Brian Brushwood This is where one of the characters is sleeping. Fixing a post, we’ll be fine.

Leo Laporte What the hell is going on here?

John C. Dvorak This is Leo before a trip!

Brian Brushwood Senioritis right?

Leo Laporte Ah, who cares! I don’t know, it’s not, nothing’s coming up. You know you can just go to the website and listen there. One of the nice things about audible, they do have this preview thing, the button…

Brian Brushwood You could maybe try one of the other books, I don’t know if it’s just not…

Leo Laporte No, no, it’s this computer, I’m having problems with this computer.

John C. Dvorak What’s wrong with it?

Leo Laporte It’s a USB thing, it’s a – you just don’t want to know. Anyway, A Song of Ice and Fire, there are I think five, yeah?

Brian Brushwood Well, there are four…

Leo Laporte Four.

Brian Brushwood Fifth one is about to come out and there are people howling at him because if you go to his blog he talks about the NFL and doing a pizza pub-crawl and people are just like “why are you not finishing the series?”

Leo Laporte Yes, get to work, get to work, we got to – so I’m very excited, I have all four, this is - and I have listened to the first and I can’t wait to hear the rest. Good pick, Game of Thrones: A Song of Ice and Fire, you can get this book with two credits because it’s such a long book, how many hours is it, it’s 33 hours.

Brian Brushwood Is that all, I thought it was way more, it feels like much more.

Leo Laporte It feels interminable.

John C. Dvorak That’s a recommendation if you ever heard one. It feels like death, I’ve never had such a good book to read.

Leo Laporte You wanted long books on audible.

John C. Dvorak Yes, because you – if you’re on an airplane right, so you can nod off.

Leo Laporte That’s the beauty of it. You can nod off, wake up and you haven’t really missed that much.

John C. Dvorak No you still heard it.

Leo Laporte You still heard it. It’s in your head somewhere.

Brian Brushwood That’s the way it was with Atlas Shrugged, at some point I would just kind of let the words wash over me.

John C. Dvorak I think shrugged is the word.

Leo Laporte But that is a long book and you are right, you didn’t really miss anything, just three quarters in the middle. This is worth listening to every word, you get your two credits and you might want to apply them to this excellent choice, George R. R. Martin’s A Game of Thrones. Thank you, Brian, really really good pick.

So, let’s see what else we got here on the TWiT book march.

John C. Dvorak Can you pass the lemonade over here?

Leo Laporte This is great stuff, this is the Odwalla lemonade.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, I’m not a big fan of Odwalla.

Leo Laporte You are not!

John C. Dvorak Well…

Leo Laporte Remember we…

John C. Dvorak …they pretend to be a small little company it’s actually huge…

Leo Laporte They were – they were in Santa Cruz, but then they got bought by some monster conglomerate. You know why though, they had that big pasteurization issue...

John C. Dvorak Yes, they killed some kid.

Leo Laporte Yes. So they really couldn’t go on as a tiny juicer out of Santa Cruz, they needed to start pasteurizing, but we used to have Odwalla Dallas, remember at this site?

John C. Dvorak No

Leo Laporte Did you ever come by this site – you did, didn’t you?

John C. Dvorak I was on your show a couple of times.

Leo Laporte I didn’t have a show.

John C. Dvorak I was working for them.

Leo Laporte The site was a show.

John C. Dvorak No remember when we did the site – yeah, the site was a show but it had segments, you had this – I remember you at the table and I was arguing with you and you said…

Leo Laporte Oh, yes.

John C. Dvorak ‘AOL is never going to be worth a powder’ and their stock went from ten bucks to a thousand dollars a share.

Leo Laporte But I was right, in the long run.

Brian Brushwood He was – eventually you were right, yes.

Leo Laporte I was right in the long – that’s the show where I said Microsoft -- Internet Explorer 1 is out; Netscape, sell your Netscape, it’s over for Netscape, Microsoft has entered the fray and apparently Marc Andreessen had a conniption, came running down the hall at Netscape said ‘who the hell is this Leo Laporte?!’

John C. Dvorak Well, you got your name known.

Leo Laporte Why is he – but I was right again on that, well, not right away…

John C. Dvorak Again?

Leo Laporte Twice in a lifetime!

John C. Dvorak I listened to your -- I was on that thing a lot with you.

Leo Laporte Twice – all right, anyway so they had – actually this turned out very poorly, but they didn’t want to give us free beverages so they would give – first they gave free Odwalla.

John C. Dvorak Look at this expensive mug you have…

Leo Laporte It’s a TWiT Mug, it’s not expensive. In fact you can buy these at –

John C. Dvorak At a TWiT store.

Brian Brushwood I love my TWiT Mug. It’s the only mug I use at home.

Leo Laporte You have a TWiT Mug?

Brian Brushwood You gave it to me on my premier visit.

Leo Laporte You didn’t steal my salad, did you?

Brian Brushwood No. I heard about the Great Salad Caper of 2009.

Leo Laporte I’m never going to forget it, whoever you are!

John C. Dvorak I’m surprised somebody hasn’t put “jumped the shark” into the chatroom.

Leo Laporte It’s – any minute now.

Brian Brushwood So what’s left?

John C. Dvorak It’s a sad story; finish your story.

Leo Laporte So they were giving away free Odwallas, they had a refrigerator. The site was an MSNBC production with Ziff-Davis.

John C. Dvorak Right.

Leo Laporte And they thought they had a lot of money, so they had you know, free coffee because we had that wonderful –

John C. Dvorak The espresso machine.

Leo Laporte – espresso machine from Café Trieste that I actually went to Café Trieste and learnt how to use, and they had free Odwalla drinks. But then they got – these were very expensive and they were wiped out. You know every – the Odwalla guy would come in and it would be gone by the end of the day!

John C. Dvorak Sure. I would take them home.

Leo Laporte So they had to do Odwalla dollars; they gave you like wooden nickels, and they’d dole them out to get your Odwallas.

John C. Dvorak I don’t remember that.

Leo Laporte Yeah. You know you weren’t an employee, you just visited.

John C. Dvorak I got paid.

Leo Laporte Really, they paid you?

John C. Dvorak Yeah?

Leo Laporte That doesn’t seem like what NBC’s policy would be; to pay contributors.

John C. Dvorak I got paid. I usually don’t, well, it’s a known fact –

Leo Laporte You don’t like to work for free.

John C. Dvorak It’s a waste of time.

Leo Laporte Why work for free? You know what I’m doing for free?

John C. Dvorak You’re going to China.

Leo Laporte No. I’m paying for that one, but I’m going to Dubai in October for TEDx Dubai. October 10th, 10/10/09.

John C. Dvorak You haven’t been to Dubai I take it.

Brian Brushwood Uh oh.

Leo Laporte Oh dear. Is there something you would like to tell me?

John C. Dvorak Well, you know what the temperature is here right now, around 100?

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte All the time?

John C. Dvorak No. No, usually it’s between noon and about two or three or four, it goes to about 140 and the whole –

Leo Laporte No!

John C. Dvorak The whole country shuts down and –

Leo Laporte No!

Leo Laporte – it reopens around 4 O’clock.

Leo Laporte No!

John C. Dvorak Yeah, you have to be inside.

Leo Laporte Well, I will be. I’m sure I’ll be in some luxury hotel.

Brian Brushwood Can’t you just take the new AC unit with you?

Leo Laporte I don’t think they’d have the conference on the sands!

John C. Dvorak That’s all there is, it’s just sand! It’s unbelievable.

Leo Laporte Well you’ve been, you got to go. Everybody’s got to go to Dubai once.

John C. Dvorak It’s a long-haul. You think the trip to China is miserable?

Leo Laporte I told them I want Business Class on Emirates.

John C. Dvorak That’s a nice ride.

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak I’ve been on Emirates.

Leo Laporte Yeah. I thought that would be, you know, that’s my contingent.

John C. Dvorak So here is my Emirates story. This is a little off topic.

Brian Brushwood Really.

John C. Dvorak But so what else is new?

Leo Laporte Have we been on topic on this show at all?

John C. Dvorak No. And I’m the one that’s always – I’m the one that’s charged with keeping us on topic and I for some reason –

Leo Laporte Well, you have picked a poor representative ladies and gentlemen.

John C. Dvorak So, I go on Emirates and they’ve sort of – they bring out this, we’re number one in the Traveler’s Magazines and so they bring out all these magazines and they say okay, here it is, here is the survey we want you to fill it out right now. You cannot get off the plane until you fill this thing out. And make sure to check that you think we’re excellent and they have all these checkboxes –

Leo Laporte So they’re holding you hostage?

John C. Dvorak Yeah, and then they make everybody fill this thing out, and then they take them and they mail them in for you. And then they become number one!

Brian Brushwood Wow…

John C. Dvorak It’s hilarious.

Leo Laporte So David Schmidt has done the math, he probably used Wolfram Alpha for this. SFO to Narita to Beijing is 6462 miles, SFO to Vancouver to Shanghai to Peking is 7000 miles. So I’m actually saving 438 miles.

John C. Dvorak Well it’s possible I’m wrong then. Okay. What about – what’s the distance to Dubai via London which is the trip that you make.

Brian Brushwood To put it in perspective, the chat room keeps reminding you that Roz is rowing it, so –

Leo Laporte Yeah, she’s rowing this distance!

Brian Brushwood It could be worse!

Leo Laporte I told her I’m waving as I pass. Did you see they’re going to make a movie out of Facebook?

Brian Brushwood You know, what’s funny is when I read that, because it said status of Facebook movie, I thought that the whole movie would be just reading Facebook statuses.

Leo Laporte Brian got home.

John C. Dvorak I could get a bit part in these things.

Leo Laporte This would be – you should be in this. They want to use the kid Michael Cera who’s, you know, he is in all of those –

Brian Brushwood Arrested Development and Juno.

Leo Laporte Yeah, he is great; love him. And they want to use him to play Mark Zuckerberg. David Fincher is in “advanced talks” to direct.

Brian Brushwood Now that shocked me, I’m a huge fan of David Fincher’s stuff.

Leo Laporte What was his last one? It wasn’t –

Brian Brushwood Benjamin Button.

Leo Laporte Wasn’t such a good movie.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, I didn’t see it. But I loved Fight Club and Se7en…

Leo Laporte Fight Club is brilliant.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte Se7en; brilliant, but Benjamin Button not so good.

Brian Brushwood Okay.

John C. Dvorak I couldn’t watch it.

Leo Laporte It was – well you saw Forest Gump, right?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Same movie.

Brian Brushwood Just played in reverse.

John C. Dvorak I could watch Forest Gump; I watched the movie, I enjoyed it. But I could not watch this movie, I just – I was just, like I can’t stand it.

Leo Laporte Life is like a box of chocolates… It was not a great movie, Benjamin Button. And it was a little weird, at first I thought it was his make up…

John C. Dvorak Lowest daytime temperature 10 day forecast from Dubai; 104.

Leo Laporte 104.

John C. Dvorak Lowest.

Leo Laporte It’s 107 right now in Beijing, and it’s humid.

John C. Dvorak Is it really?

Leo Laporte Yes, really hot and it’s 99% humidity.

John C. Dvorak Well that can’t be good.

Leo Laporte I was told “don’t wear nylon”. Not that I would, but…

Brian Brushwood I’m surprised that was the warning you needed! So what’s the – the movie is based on –

Leo Laporte Would you like a Facebook movie? The story hasn’t been told yet though…

Brian Brushwood I thought it was based on a book, I thought it was based on –

Leo Laporte Yeah, The Accidental Billionaires.

John C. Dvorak Just ask Sarah Lacy to write it.

Leo Laporte Oh jeez.

John C. Dvorak Well…

Leo Laporte She is friends with Mark.

John C. Dvorak Yeah. Good buddies.

Leo Laporte A good buddy.

Brian Brushwood This seems like one of those – I picture some studio executive sitting with a cigar in his hands and he calls a sycophant in and he says, “What are the kids doing today? They are doing the Facebook? All right, we’ll make a movie on the Facebook! We’ll make millions!”

Leo Laporte Make a move!

Brian Brushwood Make millions! Yeah; where are the kids. 200 million! We’ll do it. Get that kid from the Juno movie.

Leo Laporte Or Shia LaBeouf.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte Well, I’d like – you know I’d like to see Sarah –

Brian Brushwood No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no…

Leo Laporte Is that your Transformers impression?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, that’s my Shia LaBoeuf impression.

Leo Laporte I like it. It’s very good.

Brian Brushwood No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no…

John C. Dvorak This is basically a comedy show ladies and gentlemen.

Leo Laporte It’s become a morning zoo I think you’re exactly right.

John C. Dvorak The Morning Zoo. We need –

Brian Brushwood Colleen did just laugh out in the other room.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, she laughed, she’s helping us.

Leo Laporte We’re going to have to mic her. Whose joke did she laugh at? No, no, no, no, no?

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte I sound like a car starting.

John C. Dvorak She likes – she laughs at sound effects.

Leo Laporte Yeah. All right, we’ve got to keep that in mind. We do – we need more horns, bells.

John C. Dvorak Well you have this sound effect disc that –

Leo Laporte I do.

John C. Dvorak I remember we used to use those sound effects constantly.

Leo Laporte You did.

John C. Dvorak Well…

Leo Laporte It was like even a monkey something to do with a radio show.

John C. Dvorak Honk honk.

Brian Brushwood [Assorted silly noises]

John C. Dvorak Yeah, it was over the top.

Leo Laporte It was fun, I loved it. It didn’t bother me.

John C. Dvorak It must have bothered somebody.

Leo Laporte Yeah, because the show just… I would play them, but you know I’m not getting any audio out of this machine, unfortunately.

Brian Brushwood So how about the super intelligent ads that know what all your friends like?

Leo Laporte This kind of annoys me. And something Facebook has done for a long time is it will look and see what you’ve done and then make an ad for that on your friend’s page, so it looks like you’re recommending a product. It’s very…

Brian Brushwood Oh really?

Leo Laporte It’s very – well it’s sneaky and it works

John C. Dvorak Sketchy. Sketchy. It’s sketchy.

Leo Laporte Very sketchy but it works. If see a picture of john on my Facebook page saying, you know, ‘I use Oxiclean’, I’m going to use it.

John C. Dvorak No you're not.

Brian Brushwood That’s how much sway john has.

Leo Laporte I’m going to say John’s – a

John C. Dvorak What, you’re looking for detergent? Is that what you are up to, I mean, I’ve been trying to figure out what detergent to buy but now that John uses Oxiclean, I think I will.

Leo Laporte I actually clicked a banner ad and bought something on Facebook the other day.

John C. Dvorak Really?

Leo Laporte Yeah.

John C. Dvorak What?

Brian Brushwood The only ads I see on Facebook and Myspace are ads for Big Lebowski T-shirts, because you know you list your favorite movies and stuff in there, so everything –

Leo Laporte Oh that’s interesting, so it shows you something..?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, all the ads.

Leo Laporte It keeps showing me this ad for Obama’s watch. So I bought it.

John C. Dvorak What? What do you mean – it was his watch? Does he –?

Leo Laporte Not his actual watch. The same kind of watch that he wears.

John C. Dvorak What does he wear?

Leo Laporte It’s this – I’m not wearing it right now.

John C. Dvorak I think this is pathetic by the way. But what watch does he wear

Leo Laporte It’s – I can’t remember but it’s –

John C. Dvorak What a fan boy you are.

Leo Laporte Oh it’s engraved on the back. It says this is his watch.

John C. Dvorak What?!

Leo Laporte Isn’t that sad?

John C. Dvorak It’s hilarious. It is. Well, I don’t know if sad is the word but –

Leo Laporte I have a plate. No I don’t have a plate.

John C. Dvorak Did you get an Obama plate? Commemorative plate?

Leo Laporte I didn’t get the plate. But we do have – I didn’t buy it, but we do have mugs.

John C. Dvorak Mugs? I want to know what watch he uses.

Leo Laporte It’s – I’m looking at Facebook and the ad’s no longer there. I guess because they know I bought it.

John C. Dvorak You’re the one guy.

Brian Brushwood That’s clever though. It’s like the ads smart enough to be like, alright he bought it, quit showing him the ad.

Leo Laporte They’re very –

John C. Dvorak Ooh that is cool

Leo Laporte This is where they’re going to make money. I don’t know if they’re making money yet but…

John C. Dvorak That’s cool.

Leo Laporte I think it’s

Brian Brushwood It turns out that it’s, which is a watch group.

John C. Dvorak Actually somebody just put down

Leo Laporte I think it is.

John C. Dvorak So type it up and see what we get.

Brian Brushwood Well in a weird way this would be a welcome change if the ads were a little bit smarter, because it seems like you can always tell exactly why they’re popping up. I took – I was out jogging and I ran across the golden gate cemetery and took a picture of it and said hey, this is kind of cool picture, the golden gate cemetery. Everyone who went there from twitter saw giant ads saying get a certificate of a doctorate in bereavement. Because I guess they had the word cemetery in there. So not –

John C. Dvorak Apparently just crashed

Leo Laporte No this is presidential watch company and authorized Jorg Gray retailer.

John C. Dvorak This is fantastic.

Leo Laporte Barack Obama’s

John C. Dvorak I thought Obama was against all this kind of commercialization.

Leo Laporte He’s not doing it. Somebody else is doing it.

Brian Brushwood

“Yes you can”. 

John C. Dvorak He must have something to do with it or it wouldn’t –

Leo Laporte No he doesn’t have. He’s the president. No, he’s the president, they could do anything they want.

John C. Dvorak No there’s something, that’s not true.

Brian Brushwood Yeah. And actually, because there was some talk like, somebody used a clip of president Clinton denying the sexual liaison in the ad and they…

Leo Laporte There it is. There’s the watch – and they can’t use that?

Brian Brushwood Well they took heat from it and but then they ignored it and kept doing it. By the way, I love the headline on this website. “Yes you can… wear the same watch.”

John C. Dvorak “Yes you can, wear the same watch.” That’s hilarious.

Leo Laporte Oh I am. Anyway so I – they somehow knew.

John C. Dvorak So I’m looking at this watch, what’s so – it’s a watch.

Leo Laporte It’s a crappy watch.

John C. Dvorak Is it a crappy – it’s a crappy…

Leo Laporte It’s a crappy watch.

John C. Dvorak Do you have it?

Leo Laporte Yeah

John C. Dvorak Did you get it?

Leo Laporte I got it.

John C. Dvorak And you think it’s a crappy watch?

Leo Laporte It’s not great.

John C. Dvorak It’s not great – so you're not endorsing the watch and you’re reluctantly not endorsing it from the sound of it

Leo Laporte No it’s the same watch as he’s wearing. I feel bad though that our president is wearing a crappy watch.

Brian Brushwood Hey you disagree with one thing with Obama?

John C. Dvorak Do you think he should be wearing a Rolex or something?

Leo Laporte Yeah, shouldn’t he?

John C. Dvorak Or a digital watch maybe?

Leo Laporte It would be inappropriate – yeah he’s a geek, he should probably wear a digital watch.

John C. Dvorak He should.

Leo Laporte With a calculator watch.

Brian Brushwood With a calculator, yeah.

Leo Laporte With a stylus inside. yeah. No it’s an okay watch

John C. Dvorak Huh.

Leo Laporte It’s not a great watch. I mean I got it for father’s day so I don’t want to say too much.

John C. Dvorak But you bought it.

Leo Laporte Well, that’s how it works in our family. I was lying in bed…

John C. Dvorak You picked your own present?

Leo Laporte …yeah, I was lying in bed, I said ‘oh look Obama’s watch.’ She said ‘do you like it?’ I said ‘yes.’ she said ‘buy it for yourself.’ I said ‘I’ll buy it and you can give it to me for Father’s –‘ so I had it shipped to Jennifer, she wrapped it and then gave it to me. She does that for Mother’s day too. I give her you know, clothes, jewelry, cars. It’s not really working out for me.

John C. Dvorak Yeah you got a crappy watch. You got a crummy deal.

Leo Laporte I got a watch.

John C. Dvorak Wow

Leo Laporte No and it’s got – on the back it says, this is the watch that the president wears.

John C. Dvorak Huh. Well, who makes this watch?

Leo Laporte Jorg Gray

John C. Dvorak Jorg Gray?

Leo Laporte Yeah. Jorg Gray. And see it’s got a nice engraving and it’s a serial number and – I’m such a sucker. It’s got three buttons.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, well, that’s good. Do they work? Or are they just pieces of things sticking out?

Leo Laporte Yeah, they kind of work. Well, you know, no they all do something. It’s good for timing tea. Got a little tea timer on it.

John C. Dvorak Oh okay.

Leo Laporte I think Obama is a tea drinker.

John C. Dvorak How much does this watch cost?

Leo Laporte It was only like $300, it wasn’t that expensive.

John C. Dvorak Holy crap.

Leo Laporte It wasn’t that expensive. That’s not expensive for a watch. That’s nothing for a watch.

John C. Dvorak You can go to Canal Street and buy Rolexes that are really good, actually.

Leo Laporte $10

John C. Dvorak and they’re like, well, not the good Rolex..

Leo Laporte I wouldn’t wear a Rolex because somebody would cut your arm off for that.

John C. Dvorak You wear the silver one.

Leo Laporte Why is that?

John C. Dvorak Because then nobody will cut your arm off.

Leo Laporte They only want the gold?

John C. Dvorak Yeah. Nobody wants a silver Rolex. They’re not going to steal for it.

Leo Laporte Really?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Silver or stainless?

John C. Dvorak Stainless.

Leo Laporte Yeah, no I like stainless.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte I like titanium.

John C. Dvorak Okay. Next topic.

Leo Laporte I think that’s it.

John C. Dvorak Oh brother.

John C. Dvorak And so we’ve covered nothing today. This was terrible.

Leo Laporte No you feel like we didn’t, but in fact if you look back on it we covered quite a bit. Steve Job’s liver.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte Billy May’s beard…

Brian Brushwood The Facebook movie.

Leo Laporte Facebook movie.

Brian Brushwood Throat-beards. The price for Windows 7

John C. Dvorak Linux in China.

Leo Laporte See we covered a ton of stuff.

Brian Brushwood Oh you know the only thing that’s left is Yahoo!

Leo Laporte Yeah or Carol Bartz, we were going to mention –

Brian Brushwood To me Yahoo! it’s like the mental rolodex just comes up with $31 a share. Every time I think of –

Leo Laporte I know.

Brian Brushwood Every time I think of Yahoo! I think of $31 a share.

Leo Laporte What is their share price these days?

Brian Brushwood $15.75 now.

Leo Laporte That’s got to hurt. So, Carol Bartz, who is the new CEO of Yahoo! is speaking at the shareholders’ meeting…

Brian Brushwood Yeah, she was hardcore too.

Leo Laporte She was.

Brian Brushwood Somebody stood up and asked ‘what are you doing to – about China’s unfair freedom of speech policies and stuff’ and her response was ‘Yahoo! was not incorporated to fix China. Next question.’

Leo Laporte Wow! Next question!

John C. Dvorak Good for her.

Leo Laporte She was right, I mean but do you feel like they have some corporate obligation?

John C. Dvorak They do.

Leo Laporte They do?

John C. Dvorak I think so.

Leo Laporte Google has been in trouble in China for…

Brian Brushwood Don’t mention the G-word, because that’s the other thing she said. She said that they shouldn’t compare Yahoo! to Google, because Google is just pure search and it’s not fair. Yahoo!...

Leo Laporte Oh yeah, they’re just search.

Brian Brushwood Yeah Yahoo! – this is her words, Yahoo! is more of an online home for people trying to make sense of the world around them.

Leo Laporte Oh please.

John C. Dvorak So yes, close at 15.74. Let’s take a look just as we’re bringing this up. Let’s take a look at the key statistics here off the Yahoo! site.

Leo Laporte A shareholder complained about Yahoo! Posting too many entertainment stories in the front page She said ‘if I see another Britney Spears thing I am going to throw up.’

Brian Brushwood By the way if she was thinking when they asked the question about China, she should have just said ‘we’re sending Leo over. Case closed.’

Leo Laporte Yeah, Leo’s going, he’ll take care of it.

John C. Dvorak So looking at this, the PEG for Yahoo! is 2.65.

Leo Laporte What’s the PEG?

John C. Dvorak The price-earning growth ratio.

Leo Laporte Growth ratio.

John C. Dvorak And that should be one. One would be ideal. And two –

Leo Laporte Higher is worse? Much worse.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, so in other words, if it was going to be – in other words the stock is kind of selling twice as much for what it should be selling for. Twice as much as it should be selling for.

Leo Laporte Ooh, two and a half times, yeah, wow.

John C. Dvorak Two and a half. I mean if you – based on the PEG. Unless they could – unless you’re kind of a crazy company that can change your sales figures like overnight, and I don’t see that with Yahoo! so I am not – I wouldn’t, I don’t know, I just don’t have – it’s a dim view I have, that’s what I am trying to say.

Brian Brushwood But seriously how hard must it be to get up for the third year in the row after declining shares and explain how this time it’s going to be different and I mean it?

Leo Laporte Well she is the new CEO, so she hasn’t had to explain this before.

John C. Dvorak Well, she’s at least organizational, that’s the problem with the company.

Leo Laporte Yeah she might help it. And she sure –

John C. Dvorak There’s probably a lot of money they could be making. Obviously by the PEG they should.

Leo Laporte They ought to be making, yeah.

John C. Dvorak That they’re just letting slide, because they don’t – they’re not organized.

Leo Laporte Maybe that’s all it is. Just structural.

John C. Dvorak Could be.

Leo Laporte Could be. and she’s certainly got the Moxy, she’s kind of the Annie Oakley of CEOs.

Brian Brushwood The Moxy, I love that word.

Leo Laporte She has the Moxy.

John C. Dvorak She’s got the goods.

Leo Laporte She says ‘we’re going to get our Mojo back.’

Brian Brushwood Yeah, what an unfortunate choice of words.

John C. Dvorak In that voice. I think that should be your Carol Bartz voice.

Leo Laporte She gotta – she’s smoked a few packs and she says ‘we are going to get our Mojo back. Next question.

Brian Brushwood And we are going to make a movie about the Facebook

Leo Laporte Then we’re gonna sale ‘em. Ahhh!' Yeah, movie about the Facebook.

John C. Dvorak Is that Patty or…

Brian Brushwood Patty or Selma?

Leo Laporte That’s one of them

Brian Brushwood Right, we also talked about the Simpsons, see we covered all kinds of stuff.

Leo Laporte See we covered a lot of stuff here.

Brian Brushwood We talked about the Amazon kicking –

Leo Laporte Do people wear watches, are you wearing a watch? You’re not wearing a watch.

John C. Dvorak No. I use a cell phone.

Leo Laporte You are not wearing a watch. Nobody wears watches because everybody’s got the time all the time. A watch is…

Brian Brushwood It’s the return of the pocket watch.

Leo Laporte A watch is kind of an industrial era…

John C. Dvorak Yeah, actually you are right. That’s what I thought too. It’s the return of the pocket watch.

Leo Laporte Why? Oh the pocket watch is the phone.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Brian Brushwood Yeah we all have pocket watches now.

Leo Laporte That’s a good point. I have the weather too.

Brian Brushwood You carry that around on you?

Leo Laporte Yeah, I have this in my pocket.

John C. Dvorak You should put that outside and see how hot it was?

Leo Laporte I do, I have a little thermometer it’s sitting outside.

John C. Dvorak Yeah, does it – can you?

Leo Laporte 92 degrees.

John C. Dvorak Oh.

Leo Laporte Cooled down a bit.

Brian Brushwood In fact actually the only story we didn’t cover was iPhone Bob leaving Apple.

Leo Laporte That’s kind of sad. You know who that is?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte That’s the guy in the black turtleneck who did all the demos.

John C. Dvorak Yeah. Right.

Leo Laporte He’s become a VC. Must be money in the demos at Apple?

Brian Brushwood He helped to create it didn’t he?

Leo Laporte Oh he was like the – he was like builder Bob?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, I think it was builder Bob was his other job.

Leo Laporte iPhone Bob, builder Bob, same thing.

Brian Brushwood But those demos, am I the only one who drives me nuts that they refused to use a definite article, when referring to iPhone? Like it’s never a iPhone, or the iPhone…

Leo Laporte It was Macintosh, not ‘the’ Macintosh, it was ‘Macintosh’.

Brian Brushwood Right but nobody. I mean when you say, which one do you have? Oh I a iPhone or an iPhone, I mean nobody follows it but they insist

Leo Laporte It’s not as bad as when who – Guess Who, was it ‘Guess Who’ or ‘The Who’ that were just ‘Who’?

Brian Brushwood Oh really?

Leo Laporte Yeah it was confusing. ‘Who are you going to see?’ ‘Who.’

Brian Brushwood Who’s on first?

Leo Laporte Who.

Brian Brushwood Zing!

Leo Laporte I mean that was the idea. Who? Who?

Brian Brushwood They say it’s the guess who in the chat room.

Leo Laporte It’s not Guess Who, but it is The Who, is it The Who, or Who?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, it’s The Who.

John C. Dvorak No, it’s The Who. And the Guess Who. Who became Bachman Turner Overdrive if I’m not mistaken.

Leo Laporte Really?

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Taking care of business. That’s what we’ve been doing right here on TWiT 201. We thank you so much for being here. And yes I know you’re sad, you’re going to shed some tears, but another TWiT is in the can.

Now let the party begin!

Brian Brushwood Let’s drop the wine.

Leo Laporte Yeah!

Brian Brushwood Who said that?

Leo Laporte Oh wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Brian Brushwood Wait, what?

Leo Laporte I can’t end this show, I forgot to say Brian Brushwood is the host of Scam School, which you’ll catch on Revision3.

Brian Brushwood Yep.

Leo Laporte Just – you were just shooting this week.

Brian Brushwood Yeah, we have a new episode out Thursday. Very excited about this trick. It’s a trick where you cheat a poker. That’s always fun.

Leo Laporte Calacanis on line three for you. He’s got the World Series of Poker coming up.

John C. Dvorak Twitter him.

Brian Brushwood Should I hook him up?

Leo Laporte Yeah hook him up. Do you think you could do it at the World Series of Poker and get away with it?

Brian Brushwood Maybe.

Leo Laporte You know what you win at the World Series of Poker?

Brian Brushwood Yeah, what could possible go wrong trying?!

Leo Laporte You got to know when to hold ‘em – also shwood on Twitter, it’s

Brian Brushwood Yeah, there is no C in shwood. It’s just shwood.

Leo Laporte It’s beautiful. It’s beautiful.

Brian Brushwood Yeah.

Leo Laporte And John C. Dvorak’s at

John C. Dvorak .com.

Leo Laporte Also THErealDVORAK, I could use a few more people.

Leo Laporte THErealDVORAK on Twitter, and don’t forget No Agenda and Tech5 and Cranky Geeks.

John C. Dvorak PC Magazine.

Leo Laporte You know when you were doing columns you did like 23 columns a month.

John C. Dvorak Yeah.

Leo Laporte Now you’re doing podcasts, you’re going to same thing aren’t you?

John C. Dvorak I just – I am bored.

Leo Laporte Got nothing else to do.

John C. Dvorak I don’t go anywhere, nobody invites me to anything. What I supposed to do? I come here once in a while.

Leo Laporte John will be back to host next week, I am off to China. I thank you for joining me. I am Leo Laporte. I will see you on the Airbus 330-300. Bye bye!


Visit Pods in Print for bespoke transcription services.